even though it's been a full two days since i posted the last tip and you're like, totally ready for this whole ew gross 'recession' thing to be over, it's not. times are still tough. shit's still rough.
a lot of people have been asking me questions lately about how i still manage to look like the quintessential definition of style & beauty while maintaining the musk of old, filthy money in these hard times. my only response is that it's not easy being bobby billions & this recession isn't doing anything to help. however, with a little bit of persistence, sticktoitiveness and good old-fashioned chain-snatching, you too can be just like p.bob...which brings me to my second Tip to Staying Recession-Proof:
2) chainsnatch
this is my good friend cliff skighwalker
as you can tell by the picture, he is indeed a champion. in fact, he's so much of a champion, i recently decided to snatch his chef piece chain. figured a guy with that much swagger wouldn't even miss it. turns out he does. but here's the beauty of chain snatching: once you get a chain, the ball is in your court (or should i just say the chain is on your neck?) i'm now in the position to ransom cliff's chain back to him...for a billion dollars. bobby billions wouldn't accept any less. and if he doesn't feel like forking over the billion dollars, i can continue to 'turn my swag on,' as soulja boy would say & wear the chain whenever i feel like it. it's obviously a win-win situation for you, the chainsnatcher. for the chainsnatched, not so much. but who cares about them? you're balllllllliiiiinnnnnnn' like jim jones used to. and that's as good as it gets. more tips coming soon.
your move, skighwalker.
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